Isn't it Ironic? Don't you think?

*Naguumapaw lang talaga ang kaligayahan ko so I feel i have to release some of it in writing.*

I have never been in love - as in seriously involved in a serious relationship.  In fact, vice president pa nga ako ng samahang NBSB (No boyfriend since birth). So i think, i don't have the authority to write something about love ni magbigay man lang ng advise because, i've never been there, never done that.  Ewan ko. Pangit lang talaga siguro ako.  Siguro, I am not thin or sexy enough gaya ni Solenn Heusaff or Sam Pinto. I remember when i used to work near South Harbor, me and my friend Sheena would always have coffee after work at Starbucks Intramuros.  And we would walk around the walled city when we go home and we talk and rant to ourselves why in our age, we're still single. hahaha... :))

"Maganda naman ako, di ba?  Matalino naman ako, nakatapos ng college at may magandang trabaho.  Bakit walang nagkakagusto sa 'kin?" - this is our usual lines. and after saying these things, we would laugh at ourselves.  But lo and behold! after a year or so, nauna siyang nagkaron ng lovelife sa akin. and I'm still left asking those questions to the universe. LOL  :))

Sabi nga nila, love will hit you in the most unexpected time and in the most unexpected place.  In my life, I have done a lot of things that I swore I'd never do.  One of them was to teach, another was to be a call center agent.  But the most unexpected thing is to be able to find love in cyberspace. Honestly, when i was still a little kid, i have these fantasies of meeting a successful guy like a doctor or engineer and eventually get married in a lavish ceremony. If there's one thing i learned in my life right now, don't put a period on the things you don't want to do.  Do not put blinders on your eyes and say, "Ayoko niyan. Hinding hindi ko gagawin yan." or "Hinding hindi mangyayari sa akin yan."  because most likely, yung ayaw mo ang mangyayari sa yo.

Yes. Isa rin sa mga isinumpa kong ayaw kong gawin at hinding hindi ko gagawin ay ang mainvolve sa isang Long distance relationship (LDR).  Pero, heto ako. Involved sa isang LDR. Isinumpa ko din na hindi ako magkakaron ng jowa or asawa na hindi Pinoy. Pero, again, heto ako. Hindi lang basta caucasian na foreigner - French-African-American pa.

Oh di ba? Parang lahat na ng kabalintunaan eh nangyari na sa buhay ko.  Do I need to dare myself again? :))

Pero surprisingly, masaya ako.  I also realized na it made my life exciting.  And believe me, walang pagsidlan ang kaligayahang nararamdaman ng puso ko ngayon.

It all happened in the most hated holiday ko - Valentines day. Who knew right?   It all started with a simple "Hi" and "Happy Valentines day" greeting. I have no idea na it will go this far.  Never in my wildest dream and imagination that he will stick around for 2 years, 4 months and 5 days to be exact.  And everyday, i learn something new about him and it never fails to amaze me.  Who knew that there's a 37 yr old guy who loves to listen to Diana Ross and worse, Justin Bieber???  Loves a great steak dinner with all the works - potatoes and steamed vegetables. Loves to sing and to dance.  Even "sings" parts of songs to me like MJ's Lady of my Life, Billy Jean and Rock with you. Hahaha... It amazes me so much and feeling ko, daig ko pa si Rapunzel sa haba ng hair ko.

It was December 2011 when i have decided that I am willing to accept him and everything that comes with him after he willingly admit that he has a son.  Yes, a son.  I made my choice to love him and to give him my heart if ever he asks for it.  And you know what?  I also proved that good things come to those who wait and who hopes because on the 26th of April this year, he finally asked me to be his love (yes, this was the exact term he used).  Now, i really believe in miracles.  After 28 years of being single - he came at the right time in my life.  Pagod na rin akong mag-isa.  Pagod na akong mag-intay.

Everyday since then, he never fails to make me feel that i am important, that i am loved, and that I am greatly missed.  Everytime he says he misses me so much and that he loves me so much, i can't help but to smile.  Nakakataba talaga ng puso na malamang may nagmamahal sa yo. And today, i have felt his sincerity, saying that he is the lucky one to have come across a unique and a special girl like me. It pains me that we have to live so far away and have to deal with the different time zones most of the time.  And to make up for being apart, he always makes it a point that even though madaling araw na sa kanya, mag-uusap pa rin kami kahit na walang ka-kuwenta kuwenta ang pinaguusapan namin at tawa na lang kami ng tawa.  He was supposed to come this June but I told him not to dahil maraming bagyo ngayon. I told him to come on December and i was shocked by his answer: "Its ok with me. But can you wait for a few more months?" I'm telling you, and corny mang sabihin pero i almost cried when he said that.  I can never get used to someone making a decision based on how will i fell towards it.  I actually felt that I'm really important for him and that I am the reason talaga kung bakit siya pupunta dito.

There are still issues na hindi ko pa fully matanggap sa kanya.  I know no guy's perfect.  I'm not perfect either.  I feel that I am blessed that he chose to love me among the many possible girls he could have met everywhere.  Hindi nga siya yung dream guy na pinangarap ko noong bata pa ko pero this irony na nangyari sa akin ay lubos na nagbibigay sa akin ng kasiyahan.  Everyday, i fall deeper and deeper in love with this guy who tries his best to be honest with me kahit na minsan yung mga inaamin nya sa akin ay masakit na katotohanang dahan-dahan kong dapat lunukin dahil iyon siya eh.

You are the best thing that happened to me - next to when Adele won the Grammy's and nung natanggap ako sa Convergys. hahahaha... :)))

I don't know where all of this will lead.  I am still hoping and praying that during the course of our relationship, mapabago ko ang isip niya about marriage and that he will finally decide to get married and prove that true love still exists in this world - through me.  I hope he will realize that i could be all that he needed if he let me try.

Kaya ngayon, i think i have to get used to the idea na may boyfriend na ako.  And he is making me really, really happy.

So now, I'm throwing out my guide books, my to-do lists and my maps and i'm going to embrace life's unexpectedness.  Because hadn't i embraced all the changes and the ironies of my life, i wouldn't have met my life's Serendipity and Happiness.